The Character of Love

By Adison Martin

Jesus had a way of making difficult things sound easy. He said,

"But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you, and persecute you…" [Matt. 5:44; KJV used throughout].

There you have it, my friend. Beautiful words from the Master that laid upon his followers a responsibility that is difficult to accomplish. Do you find it easy to love?

As a young believer, I enjoyed the security of knowing that I had the answers to most questions. I have now grown old enough to realize that (alas) my answers were either too simplistic or just plain wrong. The Character of Love is one of the things about which I erred.

You see, I thought that love was easy, that it just happened. And perhaps there is a sense in which that is true for most of us. We grew up in good homes, having fathers, mothers and siblings that we loved. In those good homes, the love of our parents was seldom doubted. But did our love for our siblings just happen? Did we not learn it because our parents insisted that we do so, and because our parents first loved us? I’m sure that is so.

However, I have also met believers who were reared in terribly abusive homes, starved for affection by parents who barely even tolerated them. Did familial love just happen for them, or do you suppose that they have had to work hard in order to learn it? I doubt that love came easy for them. I believe that they must have struggled at it day by day.

I grew up hearing preachers sermonize against sins of the flesh, and at the time, I supposed that it was right to do so. But I do not recall hearing even one of them preach a complete sermon on the importance of love. If they mentioned love at all, it was to support another topic about which they preached. When that was accomplished, they changed the subject. I wonder why? Could it be that love is a much weightier subject than they were capable of teaching? Should not a sermon about love have been warranted at least once during a preacher’s tenure? Yet at the time it mattered little to me, for love seemed to be such an easy task. That is how confused I was. So, is love easy?

In recent years I have grown to realize that love, far from being an easy task, may sometimes present us with the most difficult of trials, especially when we are injured by someone else’s wrongdoing. In Satan’s great contest with God over God’s servant Job, Satan said,

"…Skin for skin, yea, all that a man hath will he give for his life. But put forth thine hand now, and touch his bone and flesh, and he will curse thee to thy face" [Job 2:4, 5].

Satan’s point was that, in order for Job to be truly tested, his trials had to be personal. It is tragic when someone across town is murdered; we feel a sense of anger and want the murderer arrested and punished. But what if it were our beloved son or daughter that was murdered? Would that not be a personal loss that would change our lives forever? We would know that in this world, we would never see or hear from our child again. We would be more than angry; we would be deeply, almost inconsolably, grieved. No doubt that we would learn to live with our loss, in time, but we would never entirely get over it. Now tell me, how easy would it be to love the murderer of our child? That is what we ought to do, is it not? (Read Matt. 5:44 again, thoughtfully.) Even so, would it be natural for you? Would it be easy? It would not be easy for me. Do you still believe, my friend, that biblical love is always an easy task?

There are actually several types of love mentioned in the bible. We are here concerned with love of God and love of our neighbor. Jesus was concerned with that too. When a lawyer asked him about the greatest commandment, he responded by quoting from the Law of Moses,

"…‘Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment’" [Matt. 22:37, 38; Deut. 6:5].

"Love" is translated from the Greek word AGAPAO, about which W. E. Vine wrote,

"Christian love has God for its primary object, and expresses itself first of all in implicit obedience to His commandments… Self-will, that is, self-pleasing, is the negation of love to God" (Expository Dictionary Of New Testament Words, by W.E. Vine, Vol. III, Lo-Ser, pg 21.)

The Love of God is first, not in the sense that God had given no commandments before He commanded it, but rather in the sense that it was the most preeminent commandment, the most important one, that God had given. Deny that measure of love of God, and few would follow His other commandments. The first duty of God’s people throughout biblical history, then, was to love God to that degree, with their entire being. Do you suppose that it is any different for believers today?

In the text above, Jesus also said that the command to love God was great. Why? "Great" was translated from the Greek word MEGAS, from which, I suppose, we derive the English word mega. It primarily refers to mass and weight, but in usage it took on more subtle shades of meaning. Here, I believe, Jesus used the word to refer to the excellence of the command to love God with all of one’s heart, soul and mind. That meaning supports the demeanor of Jesus as he called his people to repentance. And his words add substance to what Solomon, in concluding his book Ecclesiastes, had written hundreds of years before him.

"…Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this (is) the whole (duty) of man" [Ecc. 12:13].

When we omit the words that are in parentheses above, which are not found in the original text, but were supplied by the translators, we gain a better sense of Solomon’s meaning. Fearing (reverencing) God and keeping His commands are the whole of man.

If love of God requires the whole of a man, body, mind and soul, do you still think that it is easy? At the very least, it is certain that people should love God to the fullest extent possible, but could it be that some believers are better at loving Him than others? How should we treat believers who are not as good at loving Him as we are? Or, how should we treat believers who are better at loving God than we are? Herein we must find room for less judgment and more tolerance.

In answering the lawyer’s question about the greatest commandment, Jesus also spoke of the second greatest commandment. He said,

"And the second (is) like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself" [Matt. 22:39; Lev. 19:18].

Jesus said that the second greatest commandment is to "…love thy neighbor as thyself." Is that not just as true for believers today as it was for the Jews whom Jesus taught? Would we show our love for God? Then we must show it in our love for our neighbor. Would we serve God? Then we must do so in service to our neighbor. Jesus’ words are not difficult to grasp; but are they easy to obey?

It is no small wonder, then, that in Luke’s gospel, the lawyer asked a follow-up question:

"But (the lawyer), willing to justify himself, said unto Jesus, ‘And who is my neighbor’" [Luke 10:29]?

In answer to his question, Jesus told the lawyer about the man who had been beaten by thieves, and left nearly dead on the Jericho road. A priest and a Levite, revered as holy men by the Jews, when they had seen the man’s condition, passed him by without giving aid. But then a Samaritan, regarded by the Jews as both unclean and unholy, saw the man, treated his wounds and took him to an inn to recuperate, paying the man’s expenses to stay there. Even the lawyer understood that the despised Samaritan was the neighbor of the man who fell among thieves (Luke 10:36, 37). Can we not realize that our neighbor is our fellowman, particularly if he/she is in need?

Many people lack a clear concept of God as Spirit (John 4:24). Instead, they visualize God as a grandfatherly character who lives somewhere in the clouds overhead. He is no more real to them than, perhaps, a beloved family member who has already departed this life. Consequently it seems easy to love Him and nearly everyone claims to do so. But love is proven by actions, and the only way that a "new testament" believer could display his/her love of God, was to display it toward his/her brother (neighbor). The apostle John, sometimes called the apostle of love, said it this way,

"If a man say, ‘I love God,’ and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also" [John 4:20, 21].

John wrote during the time preceding the A.D. 70 destruction (by the Romans) of Jerusalem and the temple worship, a time described in both the "old" and "new testaments" as "the last days." During that time, the Christians, particularly the Jewish Christians, were persecuted and treated harshly by the unrepentant Jews, their brethren. John taught them not to hate their brothers, but to love them instead. Do you suppose it would have been easy to love them, the men who had, perhaps, murdered their relatives? I think not.

Perhaps the Jews had failed to realize, as Paul told the Roman Christians, that love was the fulfilling of the law,

"Owe no man anything, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law. For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, thou shalt not covet; and if (there be) any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Love worketh no ill to his neighbor: therefore love (is) the fulfilling of the law" [Rom. 13:8-10].

Since loving their neighbors was commanded for Christians two thousand years ago, is it not also expected of believers today? I suggest to you that it is.

Yes, love may sometimes present believers with a great challenge, but it is one that they can accept and surmount. Perhaps it would help to think of love, not as a warm emotion of the heart—which may sometimes be very difficult to maintain—but as a verb, which, under the best of circumstances, it is. A verb denotes action, does it not? When people say, "I love God," unless their service is obvious in their ministry to others, I am left wondering how they demonstrate that love. They cannot take Him out for a movie or a pizza. They cannot go fishing with Him. They cannot even see God, not in person, but they can see their neighbor whom God has created. Are they, are we—am I—doing anything to serve a neighbor, particularly a needy one?

But the paragraph above, perhaps, does not present a real trial to believers. At various times, many of them have been needy and others provided for their needs. Because of that, they/we gain great satisfaction from helping the poor. But how do we treat the backbiters and gossips? Do we love them? Do we love those who have lied about us and ruined our reputations? Have we forgiven those who have so unsettled our lives that we may not ever recover? How do we treat those who disagree with us about doctrinal issues? Do we continually love them, or do we refuse to fellowship them?

Admittedly, it is not easy to love someone who has wounded us personally, but it can be done. As Jesus said about a certain demon that his disciples could not cast out, "Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting," and he cast out the evil spirit for them [Matt. 17:21]. When we take our injuries to God in prayer, pleading for his help, will He not teach us, in time, to forgive our brother and love him again? I know that He will, for He has done so for me.

Come to think of it, with God’s help, even a difficult commandment like love becomes easy. For with Him, "all things are possible" [Matt. 19:26].

 

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